How to ask your girlfriend for a second chance when she's not interested (2023)

If your girlfriend isn't currently interested in giving you a second chance, you can pique her interest by getting her to feel a new sense of respect and attraction for you.

For example: If you and her now feel more like friends (rather than lovers or boyfriend and girlfriend), then you need to trigger her feelings of sexual attraction by making her feel girly and feminine when you interact with her.

On the other hand, if she isn't interested because you've become insecure in the relationship (eg, jealous, needy, controlling, overprotective), you need to interact with her and show her that you are now confident and emotionally strong.

Once you create a spark, the door will be opened to rebuild her feelings and lead her back into a relationship.

However, make sure you don't ask your girlfriend for a second chance until you know she's attracted again, because she'll keep pushing you away and saying things like:"I'm not interested,"or"Just accept that it's over between us. I don't feel the same for you anymore."

It can't be about you wanting her back because you love her so much or because you promise things will be different this time.

It has to be about her feeling a new sense of respect and attraction for the new and improved you, so that she can believe that things are really different now and that a relationship with you would feel good for her.

The truth is, contrary to what some people may believe, it's pretty easy to get a woman to give you a second chance if you focus on changing her feelings when she's interacting with you.

Watch this video for some examples...

As long as you actively make her feel some respect and attraction for you, she will start to get interested again.

You can make her feel that way.

However, if you make one or more of the following mistakes, she will keep saying she's not interested...

1. Asking her for another chance before her feelings are reactivated

One of the most common reactions men have when they break up is to quickly try to convince their ex to give them another chance.

For example: a man might explain what went wrong in the relationship, offer to change anything she wants, and promise her the world if she changes her mind.

However, if he doesn't first spark her feelings of respect, attraction, and love for him, all she'll usually say is,"Look, I know you mean well, but I don't care about you anymore. It's over between us. You have to let me go and get on with your life.”

What she essentially fails to bring out and say is, "I know you're sorry we broke up, but that doesn't change how I feel. Sorry is about how you feel. You still don't understand what made me stop having feelings for you and you just hope that if you apologize I will forget all the things that put me off. They also hope that we can then go back to old times. However, I'm not interested in going back to that because I don't think you can change. You have to accept that it's over and stop trying to convince me to change my mind. You don't even know how to quickly become the man I picture you, so I'll just keep going unless you can somehow make me feel different."

Sometimes a woman will give a man another chance if he convinces her that things will be different, but if she's given him chances like this before, eventually she'll get tired of it.

So don't waste your time trying to get them to give you another chance based on your promise to change.

Instead, simply ignite her feelings of respect, attraction, and love by behaving in ways that are attractive to women (e.g., that you've moved beyond the level you were on when she broke up with you, emotionally being male).

Rekindling her feelings of respect and attraction will make her more open to the idea of ​​getting back together with you.

On the other hand, if you just keep saying and doing the things that previously put her off and interacting with her in a neutral way (rather than in an attractive, masculine way), she'll keep saying:"No thank you. I'm not interested."

2. Trying to make her feel sorry for you

Sometimes it can be difficult for a man to accept that even though he is still in love with his girlfriend, she is not interested in giving him a second chance.

It's heartbreaking.

All those good times, the hugs, kisses, the sex and the loving moments are all over now and she doesn't feel that way anymore.

Some guys just can't handle that kind of rejection, so they try to get the woman to feel sorry or guilty for making him feel so sad, depressed, and rejected.

He might then start begging and begging for another chance, only for her to keep saying:"No. I don't care."

He'll feel worse than he's ever felt in his life, and then he might say something like:"How can you do this to me? I love you so much. How can you be so cold hearted after everything we've shared? Don't you care that you break my heart? You mean the world to me and you act like like I mean nothing to you Yes I screwed up but doesn't everyone deserve a second chance You may not think so but I believe what we had was worth fighting for Obviously mine was Love you genuinely while you just pretended to care about me If you really loved me you wouldn't do this to me."

But instead of making them think"Oh no! My ex must really love me if he's so sad about our breakup... maybe I'm being too hard on him. Maybe I should just give him another chance and see if it can be different this time."his behavior makes her lose even more respect and attraction for him. Why?

It's a woman's natural instinct to be more attracted to the kind of man who has the emotional strength to handle the random problems and challenges life throws at him.

So, when a guy seeks pity and makes himself look desperate and emotionally weak in a woman's eyes, she actually feels repulsed by him.

her instinct tells her"See, you were right to break up with him. He is not emotionally strong enough to cope with his problems and to take care of himself. If you give him a second chance, you probably need to take care of him and teach him how to be a man in his life. You need a man, not a boy. Go through with the breakup. He's the kind of guy who leans on you for emotional support and never grows up. Go now while you can.”

Even if the guy has the skills to be a man and handle life's challenges, her instincts will tell her otherwise because it's based on his current behavior.

It doesn't matter if a man has been emotionally strong around a woman for a year; When he gets emotionally weak, that's how weak he is in the woman's eyes.

Women want to feel safe with a man who can handle life's challenges instead of being stuck with a man who needs her to make him feel safe.

A woman wants to be with a man who is confident, confident, determined and able to take care of her, not she has to take care of him.

Instead of feeling sorry for him, his behavior actually causes her to lose even more respect and attraction for him.

Of course, sometimes it's possible to get a woman to feel enough sympathy for a guy that she gets back together with him for a few days.

However, she will just break up with him again when she realizes that he is the same as before and that he doesn't have what it takes to change what she is asking of him.

So don't waste a lot of time making your girlfriend feel sorry for you.

Instead, just start saying and doing things that make them stop and think,"Hey, what's going on here? This is not how I expected my ex to behave. He's so different now. He's actually so mature and emotionally strong. I like the new him. Maybe it's not too late to give our relationship a second chance."

When you reactivate your ex-girlfriend's feelings of respect, attraction, and love for you, you don't have to make her feel sorry for you to get her to give you a second chance.

Instead, she will want to give you a second chance because it feels good to her; not because you're trying to manipulate her feelings for you by making her feel sorry for you.

3. Saying you'll wait for her no matter how long it takes

Often when a woman says things like:"It's over between us. I'm just not interested in getting back together.A guy might decide that the only way to show her he's really serious about getting her back is to make it clear that he'll never get over her.

he could say to her"Even though you say you're not interested in giving me a second chance, I want you to know that no matter how long it takes, I'll be waiting for you. I don't want another woman. I want you. You are the only woman for me and someday you will see that no other guy will take care of you like me and that our love is worth saving.”

He might think that if he shows her how committed he is to her and how no other woman can compare, he'll feel flattered and open up again to giving him another chance.

But here's the thing...

Although a woman appreciates a man who is absolutely loving and devoted, she doesn't want to be his purpose in life and she doesn't want to be responsible for caring about his will to live or happiness in life.

She also doesn't want to feel like he can't attract other women and only wants to be with her because she originally gave him the chance to be with her.

She wants him to be confident enough to move forward and enjoy his life with or without her.

When a guy sits around waiting for his girlfriend to hopefully give him a second chance one day, it usually means he's neglecting other areas of his life.

For example: A man may choose to avoid going out socially and interacting with other women if his girlfriend finds out and thinks he's moved on.

He might neglect his career or give up his purpose in life.

But that's not attractive for a woman.

Of course, there are some women out there who enjoy an ego boost when they discover their ex is waiting for them and is going nowhere in their life.

However, the majority of women like the idea of ​​being with a man who can be happy and fulfilled in his life with or without her.

So, if you're going to ask your girlfriend for a second chance, make sure you love her genuinely and because she adds value to your life, not because she's your life and you don't plan on doing anything else without her.

Then, when you interact with her (like on a phone call or in person) and she gets the feeling that you're happy, confident, and going on with your life without her, she'll start to see you in a new light.

You will appear more attractive to her and she will be attracted to you again.

4. Being extra nice to her to show her how important she is to you

Another common mistake men make when trying to get a girlfriend to give them a second chance is to be extra nice to her.

For example: a man might shower his ex-girlfriend with gifts and tokens of his affection, help her financially by paying her rent, buy her groceries, or pay her bills, and make himself available to her 24/7.

There may think,"If I'm really nice to her, spoil her, and make me an integral part of her life, she'll realize that I really care about her and that she can't live without me. Then, even though she said she wasn't interested, she'll change her mind and give me a second chance."

However, what a guy like that doesn't understand is when a woman says things like:"Go away. I'm just not interested in getting back together.it's because she no longer has sexual and romantic feelings for him.

While she appreciates that he's being extra nice to her, it most likely won't make her think twice."What was I thinking? This guy is such a gem! I want to kiss him and have sex with him now! Watch him spoil me and do everything I want. I better give him a second chance before he escapes and another lucky woman kidnaps him.”because all he does is be nice to her without first renewing her feelings of respect and sexual attraction for him.

So don't waste your time being nice to your ex girlfriend and then feeling hurt and down when she keeps saying that"Thank you, you're so sweet, but I'm not interested in a relationship with you anymore."

Instead, you need to pique her interest by making her feel a new sense of respect and sexual attraction for you.

If you rekindle some of her feelings of respect and attraction (eg, through the way you think, speak, behave, and interact with her), she will naturally drop her guard and appreciate that you take care of them.

Then it will feel right for her to give you a second chance.

Going from "not interested" to "very interested" and then getting her back

When you first wondered how to ask your girlfriend for a second chance when she wasn't interested, you might have thought:"If she's not interested, nothing I say will make her change her mind, so it's probably a lost cause. I lost her forever. I guess I just have to accept that and let her get on with her life without me. I'm just not good enough for her."

But hopefully by now you've realized that getting her to change her mind is a lot easier than you might have thought.

When you rekindle her feelings of respect and attraction to you, something interesting happens...

She stops focusing on all the negative things about your relationship and starts seeing you in a new, more positive light.

From there, it's up to you to continue to ignite those positive emotions in her (i.e. respect, attraction, and love) and lead her back into a loving, sexual relationship with you.